Humbled

One thing I've learned the past three years with mission trips to Uganda is to trust God. Each year, especially the first, I was very worried about how I was going to pay for the trip. The cost for the 17 days is approximately $3000. I knew that this stay-at-home mom did not have the money to pay for the trip, but I knew that I was called to go.  I organized fundraisers and sent out support letters and the money started trickling in. But still I doubted. It was almost time to pay for the plane ticket, which was about $2000. That's when God showed me that he had a plan and was going to provide in a way totally outside anything I would ever imagine. My brother-in-law is a Navy Chaplain. He was serving in Iraq at the time. During his Sunday morning service he was explaining the difference between tithes and offerings and briefly mentioned that he was going to give toward my trip as an offering. After the service, a woman came up to him and gave him a check for $1000 and told him to send it to me.  God is good.

The next two years, God again blew me away with his provision. I'm so grateful for my wonderful church, my family, and dear friends for being part of that provision. And I can testify that those trips were not in vain. Thousands of children now have books to read in their libraries, the gospel was shared countless times, people came to know Jesus, brothers and sisters in Christ were encouraged, and my life was changed.

Again I find myself at a time of learning to trust in God's provision.  And I'm humbled. This adoption will be my mission trip of the year and probably Cody's too. We, of course, will be picking up Mercy, but also we are planning on working at Pastor Wilber's church in Mbale and visiting our missionary friends, Doug and Kathryn, who just moved to Northern Uganda. I also want to visit a few of the schools where we've placed libraries to show them off to Cody. We might as well stay busy while we wait around.  I know for some of you, I've asked for your help several times and I don't want to become a nuisance or a burden.  But Cody and I are asking that if you are able and would like to give toward our adoption costs, we would very much appreciate it.  The total for the adoption is an estimated $15,000.  Right now, there are two ways you can help.  First, our church is graciously accepting donations on our behalf to help with travel costs.   You can send a check to the church.  Please include a note stating that it is for us.  You can also include if you would like your name or the donation amount to remain anonymous.  The church will then send you a donation receipt for your taxes.

First Baptist Church
Attn.: Financial Secretary
PO Box 69
Mulvane, KS 67110

The second way you can help is buy purchasing a t-shirt. Our wonderful friend, Asa, designed some t-shirts for us.  Thanks Asa!!   I love the design and the meaning behind it.  The arrows represent our need to focus inward on our own spiritual walk, which will then, in turn, help us focus outward on our mission.  The words come from Micah 6:8, "And what does the Lord require of you? Act justly, love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God."  Cody preached a sermon called, "The Good Judge" on this verse a few weeks ago.  You can listen to it here (it should be posted here for at least a few more days).  It was a challenging reminder of how we are called to act and love. When I was sitting in the pew and he kept saying "love mercy" I couldn't help but smile to myself.  I am so grateful for God's mercy, which is a wonderful example to me of how I should love others unconditionally, which makes it very easy for me to love a sweet baby girl thousands of miles away named Mercy.

I  really have no idea how many of you may be interested in buying a t-shirt.  So, I'm trying to take pre-orders so I don't get stuck paying for a ton of unwanted shirts.  They are a 50/50 blend shirt.  We are asking for a $15 donation for the shirt.  If I need to mail the shirt to you a couple of extra dollars for postage would be helpful.  They are available in sizes from a Youth Medium to an Adult XXXL (XXL and XXXL are $1 more).  If you think you would like one, please send me an e-mail at melissabusby@hotmail.com so I can get a general idea of how many shirts to order and which sizes.  Then you can either pay me when you see me, mail me a check, or I can tell tell you how to pay me through PayPal.

Thanks again for your love and support!

Ponderings

So, years ago when I started contemplating adoption, I never put much thought into why it is so important. Honestly, up until about 4 months ago, I don't think I ever really grasped the reality of the orphan-crisis in our world. Sure,  I've always thought adoption is a huge symbol of love. Love by the mother giving up her child, love by the adopted parents accepting the child into their family, love by the people who work tirelessly in orphanages and foster care.  I knew there were children in my town and around the world needing to be adopted.  However, I usually thought about it as something just for infertile couples or those with "a special calling". In recent years, adoption has become a more popular issue to discuss. I've heard about a handful of churches with adoption programs, pastors challenging their church members to adopt, etc. But I guess now that I'm in the process, researching all of the ins and outs, reading books on adoption I'm seeing the problem in a whole new light. For my family, the issue now has a name... Mercy.
About a year ago, a dear friend of mine that has adopted several children through foster care told me that in her opinion the church is so caught up in being against abortion, we forget the countless numbers already born that need loving homes. Wow! I've thought of that statement many times in the past year. So are we really pro-life if we forget the the children living around us that are alone, living with a drug addict or prostitute, being abused, starving in an orphanage around the world? Don't misunderstand me.  I'm against abortion and the very idea of it breaks my heart, but why do we as Christians not put the same emphasis or passion into the cause of adoption and helping children in crisis.

I've been reading a book, "Adopted for Life" by Russell Moore. The book is all about his family's adoption story, the theology of adoption, and a call for the Church to take action. In the book, Moore clearly lines out the biblical support for adoption. Throughout the Bible, believers are commanded to care for the fatherless. When you really think about it, how could we not? It seems like a no-brainer. As Christians, we are to be symbols of light and love to the world... to be a shining example of what Christ has done for us. What could be a more shining symbol than taking a child into your home, loving them no matter their background, caring for all of their needs, giving them full rights and priveleges as a biological child, and teaching them about the love of their Heavenly Father, who spiritually speaking has done the same for you?

I know some of you are thinking... Melissa is on her soap box or that's great for "some" people. But seriously, what does this mean for YOU? Did you know that there are an estimated 147 million orphans in the world? Wow! It doesn't take a special calling from God to know that if you are a Christian, it's time for you to do something about it. I don't know what that may look like for you. Maybe you've always considered adoption, but never done anything about... do it, you aren't getting any younger, ha!  Maybe you've always been uncomfortable with the idea of adoption... read a book about it, listen to a sermon on the topic (may I recommend Russell Moore of David Platt, just google them), or search the bible for yourself.  In his book, Moore has an interesting discourse on why are we so hung up on passing on our genes to another. Does a child really have to your eyes, your husband's hair color, and Aunt Mary's laugh to be an accepted part of your family?  Maybe you are not in a place where you can adopt (too young, too old, single, work situation, whatever)... sponsor an orphan through one of the many wonderful organizations out there. Give money, love and free babysitting to a couple adopting.  Go on a mission trip to your local Children's home or to a remote village in Africa and rock babies, help a child with homework, and love the unloved.  Pray... for those contemplating adoption, for the Church to do more, for those caring for the orphans now, for those families stuck in the middle of an adoption that's taking years to complete, for the mothers thinking of placing their child up for adoption.

When Cody and I started on this journey to adopting Mercy, I didn't set out to become an adoption activist.  I thought God had given us the chance to help out a beautiful baby girl in need of a family from a country I've grown to love.  That was it.  But the deeper I get into this thing, the more I see a great need for a call to action.  And now that my eyes are opened to the need how can I possibly ignore it.  For my family right now, Mercy is our calling.  What's yours?

Progress!

I picked up the copy of our home study this afternoon!  Woo hoo!!  Cody and I will look it over for any errors, then send a copy to our attorney in Uganda to make sure it includes everything he needs.  Then we'll take it to the state capitol for official certification.  It feels so good to finally be making some progress.

Please pray that we get our FBI background clearance soon!  They received it 10 weeks ago and they told me it would take 8-10 weeks.  So I would love to find that piece of paper in the mail very soon.

I also have a couple of new pictures of Mercy to post.  These are from when she was about 5 weeks old.  They were taken by some friends of mine from Illinois (Connie and Jeanne) that were at the medical clinic about two weeks after me.  I'm so glad these wonderful women got to meet her and will now be her adopted "Aunts" and "Grandmas".  I'm grateful that God has also given these women a true heart for the people of Uganda.  They recently rounded up a ton on soft blankets to give the children at the medical clinic.  What a blessing they are!

Common Questions

So when you tell people that you adopting they ask all sorts of questions.   Thankfuly, Cody and I have not really been asked anything too rude or unnerving, but we know the day will come.  People are curious and interested in the whole process.  So, here are the answers to a few of the more common questions.  If you have more feel free to ask and I'll do my best to answer.  I'm a very curious person by nature, so I understand the need to ask.

• Will you keep her name Mercy?  Yes, we plan to keep her first name as Mercy.  We love the name and what it means and represents on so many levels.  Plus, one of my favorite people in Uganda is named Mercy, so it reminds me of her too.  We will give her a middle name, but that's yet to be determined and we haven't decided when we'll divulge that bit of information. As many of you know, when I was pregnant with Emma and Avery we kept their names secret until they were born.  It was so fun to torture all of you with it and it made it extra special when their names were "announced".

• Will you have to travel to Uganda to get her and how long will that take?  Yes, Cody and I both plan to travel to Uganda.  We plan on it taking between 3-5 weeks.  Cody will most likely not stay there that whole time.  It's a lot to ask people to watch Emma and Avery for that long, plus he'll need to get back to work.

• Why do you have to be there that long?  We will have a court date shortly after we get there.  During this time we will hopefully be granted guardianship of Mercy.  Then we have to wait for the magistrate (judge) to give his/her ruling, then to give us the paperwork on that ruling.  Then we have to get her a Ugandan passport and a birth certificate.  Then we have to wait for a meeting with the US Embassy to get her a travel visa to come to the US.  All of these things take time.  We also plan to do some work at our friend Pastor Wilberforce Okumu's church; and, hopefully, visit our friends the Taylor's who just moved to Northern Uganda to be full-time missionaries.

• What does the process look like?  Right now we are completing our home study.  This says that we are approved to adopt a child according to the US-guidelines and the state of Kansas.  From there, we will submit paperwork to immigration, which is now run by Homeland Security.  They will run another background check on us, review our home study and then make a decision.  The length of time on this varies greatly, so we aren't sure how long it will take.  It can take from a  few weeks to a few months.  After getting immigration approval, we will mail our dossier (bundle of all papers) to Uganda to the attorney we've hired there.  He will review it all and add to it the information about Mercy he has obtained.  Then he'll get us a court date.  In court, we will petition for guardianship of Mercy. 

• How in the world will you do her hair?  Ha!! I love this question because this was one of my first thoughts too.  It just goes to show how important hair is to a girl.  You will be happy to know, that I've found online videos and chat groups that explain in great detail the best way to do African hair.  I can't wait to try my hand at corn rows, twists, and other types of braids.  And you can all feel free to laugh at me as I figure this out.

• How do Emma and Avery feel about all of this?  They are both incredibly excited.  They've known about all of this for a couple of months, and we asked them to keep it quiet.  They did a great job of that, but were so excited to now be able to talk about it.  They've both taken pictures of her to school to show their classes.  We've discussed with them how she will look different than us and that some people will ask questions about that.  Both of them said that was silly and that the color of your skin doesn't matter at all.  Oh, if only we could all be so color blind!  Avery often asks what time it is in Africa and wonders what Mercy is doing at that moment.  I know they will both be great big sisters to her.
• How do your extended families feel about this adoption?  Our families have been incredibly supportive.  We know they will love Mercy and support us every step of the way. 
• How much is this all going to cost?  Honestly, we don't know for sure.  It adds up quickly and international adoption is an expensive journey.  The US does provide a generous tax-credit for adoptions. In the meantime, we are working on financing and will also do some fundraising.  We are trusting God to work out all of these details.

Encouraged

Thank you to all of you for your love, support, and encouragement in the past week or so.  Some of you have already offered cribs, changing tables, strollers, swings, clothes and even babysitting.  Cody and I are overwhelmed by it all and we feel so blessed to have each of you in our lives. 

It's not a huge update, but I am glad to be able to tell you we are making progress!  W had another interview with our social worker at his office.  Then we were trying to find a time to do our home visit/inspection and we all decided the best time would be last night.  So, I ran home and picked up the house and tried to make sure everything was presentable.  Mondays or Tuesdays are my usually house cleaning days, so I had a lot to do!  The inspection is more about safety and space and not about cleanliness, but I still wanted it to look nice.  The interview went well and everyone behaved.  Whew!  Now, our social worker will review everything from our interviews and in our file and start to draft his report. We just need to get our background checks back and he should have all that he needs.  Fingers are crossed that it will be done by the end of the month.

Ok, here are a few blog/website recommendations for you!

For those of you interested in adoption from Uganda, here is a blog I recommend checking out.  She has the process that her family went through all outlined and answers quite a few questions.

Also, if any of you are interested in what life in Uganda is like and/or you want to be truly humbled and inspired check out this blog from the head of Amazima Ministries.  She is a 21-year old from Nashville, TN who has started an amazing minsitry to feed thousands of children, provide medical care, and is now mother to 14 children!  Her story is unbelievable and shows how anything is possible with God.

And of course, I would highly encourage everyone to check out the website for Libraries of Love.  This is the organization I've traveled to Uganda with the last three summers.  Cody's aunt, Trudy Marshall, started this wonderful ministry and she has passed on her great enthusiasm and love for the people of Uganda to me.  On the website you can read blogs from Trudy on her Ugandan travels, see pictures, and read about the work planned for this summer. God is really doing some great things through this organization.

Welcome!

Ok, so I'm still trying to figure out all there is to know about the world of blogging, so you may have to be patient with me for awhile.  I hope to use this as a tool to keep you all informed about our journey and share prayer requests as well.  If you have any specific questions, let me know and I will try to answer them.  Thanks for following along!

The beginning...

Cody and I feel that God is calling us to adopt a baby girl from Uganda. The journey to this decision has been a long time in the making and we feel that God is now moving to make this a reality.

Adoption is something Cody and I have always talked about and considered as an option for us. I’ve always thought it was a beautiful picture of how we are adopted into God’s kingdom as Christians and a great way to provide a loving home for the countless orphans in the world. As many of you know, doctors did not think I had a very good chance of getting pregnant, especially after Emma was born, and then I had an even harder time carrying a baby. After a couple of very devastating miscarriages, Cody and I seriously started investigating adoption. I researched different options, but I still did not have a peace that this was the answer for us at that time. Shortly after that I got pregnant with Avery, so adoption got put aside or at least put on hold for us. After Avery’s birth, we knew that we would not have any more biological children. In many ways we considered our family complete, but there has always been an idea of adoption lingering with us.

The past three summers, I’ve traveled to Uganda, Africa on mission trips with an organization called, “Libraries of Love”. On these trips, I developed a true love the people of Uganda and I have had a burden for children there. It breaks my heart to see people living in horrible conditions, desperate poverty, and so many without someone to love them. While in Uganda, I’ve met many orphans and toured a couple of orphanages, and had many children really touch my heart. Each summer as I prepared to go, I’d ask Cody what he wanted as a souvenir. More than once he said, “A baby or some coffee.” Needless to say, he got coffee.  Please

This past summer, after I met a 3-week old orphan at a medical clinic I e-mailed Cody and said, “I found our baby.” Her name is Mercy and she was abandoned at the medical clinic run by Dr. Patrick after her mother died in childbirth. As soon as I heard about her, I felt a tug in my heart. Then I got to hold her and I felt my heart melting. Cody quickly replied to my e-mail and said “Let’s do it.” I couldn’t believe he so quickly agreed, but I knew he was serious. Dr. Patrick had told me that he had contacted another family in the U.S. to see if they wanted her. So I assumed that is what would happen, but I kept thinking about her the rest of my trip. When I got home, I e-mailed Dr. Patrick and asked if he had found a home for her and that if he had not, that we would be interested. I didn’t hear back from him, so I assumed that the other family decided to take her. I thought about her and about adoption several times in the next few months, but I figured God had closed that door.

In early October I got an e-mail from Dr. Patrick saying that he needed a home for Mercy and that if we were interested just to let him know. I remember my heart skipping a beat as I read that e-mail. Cody and I began to research all that is involved in an adoption from Uganda. I tried to get information from anyone I could. Everything seemed to say the same thing. Adoption in Uganda is not common, not easy, not cheap, but is possible.

Cody and I have continued to see God point us in this direction. We are in the middle of trying to complete our home study. Then we’ll have to wait on immigration approval from Homeland Security. After that, we’ll send everything to the attorney we’re hiring in Uganda who will get us a court date. We will most likely spend about a month in Uganda finalizing our guardianship and getting a passport and visa for Mercy to travel. Then once we return to the US, we’ll adopt her here. We hope to travel this Spring, but as with any adoption there are no timeline guarantees.

We are very excited and anxious to see this all work out. We are trusting God to work out all of the details and to grant us much needed patience. I’m glad to report, Emma and Avery are very excited about their new baby sister.

There is so much more I could write about all of this, but I’ll spare you for now.

Thanks in advance for your love, support, and prayers.