Good Friday!

So glad to tell you that I finally got a call saying we have a court date.  I thought the 10^th would be the soonest we could get in, so I am thrilled to say it’s for this Friday, the 4^th.  Not sure what will happen from here.  Generally, you have the hearing and the judge tells you what day to come back for the ruling.  The ruling is usually 1-2 weeks after the hearing.  Because my case is a review of a previous decision, I’m not sure if the same rules will apply or not, so we’ll just have to wait to see what happens on Friday.  The hearing is at 9am (midnight CST).   We've been working to get this review for about 4 months, so we are really hoping and praying that this is it.  Your prayers are certainly appreciated! 

Be a Blessing

Last week, my favorite driver, Brian (whose wedding introduction I attended), invited me to a bible study for his ministry. He said he wanted me to share with them about the Mama Kits. This ministry is called “Be a Blessing” and is made up of young people, most of whom attend Muyenga Baptist Church. Their primary goal is to be a blessing to those around them, especially those in the villages. So they search out different ways they can help. They have helped to build churches or at least give the outdoor churches a roof. They’ve worked at orphanages. They’ve led bible studies and crusades. They’ve passed out clothes and food. Any little thing they can do to encourage other believers and also reach out to unbelievers. They strongly follow the principal that we are to share the blessings and resources we have with those less fortunate. They talked about how most people in Kampala have several outfits, but those in the villages may only have one. So they collect these extra clothes to give away. It was so humbling to hear these people, who by American standards have very little, talk about all of the ways they can help others and things they can sacrifice or give away.

I think of my closets at home, our play room, our storage room… what do I hold on to for no reason that could be of use to someone else. Sure, I have garage sales and I take things to the DAV or Goodwill, but if I only had a week’s worth of clothes, would I be willing to still give things away? Brian and the others told me how they’ve never asked for donations from others or from outside groups. They’ve wanted the things to come from them. Wow! I told them a bit about the Mama Kits. And I asked them if they would help me to be a blessing to the women of Uganda. I told them I needed people like them to help me pass out the kits, pray with the women, and make sure they get to the right people. They were thrilled. They said they definitely knew many women that would need the kits. They talked about different ways they could pass them and minister to the women as well. I want people that receive the kits to know that they are given in love because Christ first loved us. I want them to know that there are Christians in the world that do care about them and their children. So, I am very excited to count “Be A Blessing” as a new partner in the Mama Kit Ministry. And I know that they will continue to inspire me, and hopefully you, to look for ways that we can be a blessing to those around us.

This idea of “being a blessing” is not new to me. It’s actually something I’ve tried to practice with my time here in Uganda. I’ve looked for any little way that God could use me to encourage someone else. Lately, I’ve had several great opportunities to help some other adoptive families. While we were waiting to come and get Mercy, I remember how excited and overjoyed we were at any little bit of news about Mercy or pictures of her. At my lawyer’s office, I’ve been able to meet a few kids that have families in the US waiting to come for them. I love getting to take their pictures and also glean any info possible about them to share with their moms and dads.

Last week, one little baby needed someone to foster him for a week or two until his family gets a court date. I really wanted to do it myself, but there was no way I could. So I got my friends, Simon and Kelly, to look after him. And I did get to babysit this little bundle of joy last Saturday! Mercy loved him. His parents are thrilled now to get regular updates and photos of him and even get to see him on Skype.

I got the privilege of going along for a physical with another little boy waiting to be adopted. It was great because I knew just the right types of things they would want to know… information that may not seem important to most people here, but is vital to an adoptive mommy’s heart. I also got to go this boy’s home, meet his grandmother, and share lots of great information and photos with his family in the US.

I’m scheduled to take pictures of a couple of others kids next week. I got to deliver gifts to some other children. I’ve also picked up lots of information on “the system” since I’ve been here. I’m so happy to be able to share little things with other families in order to make their transition and process easier. Our story has even been able to help a couple of families not make the same mistakes as us. Wow, what a privilege! I love getting to do these things and I love feeling like some of my time here can be spent being a blessing to others. Don’t get me wrong… it’s not easy being here. I hate being away from my family. I have my breakdown moments, but at least I can help others in the meantime. God can use any situation for good. So whether it’s Mama Kits or going along for a physical, I love that God is able to use me during what is one of the hardest and most challenging times of my life. I don’t tell you these things to bring attention to myself, but to encourage you that no matter your circumstances there is something you can do for someone else. So, how can you be a blessing to others today?
*******
Update on our case...

Well, there's not much to update on really. I still do not have a judge or a court date. The people needed to sign off on my file have not gone to work yet this week and today is a public holiday. I'm feeling a bit discouraged. Pray for us that tomorrow we can get some good news.

Mercy Monday, Milestones, and Moments in the Busby house

Asking for your prayers for this upcoming week. We hope to hear in the next day or two about the assignment of a judge and a court date. We are slowly making progress, but we are ready for the next step. Pray for a speedy process from here on out, but most importantly for God’s will to be done and for our lives to be used for His glory no matter the situation. Thank you so much!

Another quote from my devotional that I keep reading over and over: “If you believe that I am sovereign over every aspect of your life, it is possible to trust me in all situations. Don’t waste energy regretting the way things are or thinking about what might have been. Start at the present moment- accepting things exactly as they are- and search for My way in the midst of those circumstances.”- Jesus Calling

*****************************

Mercy Milestones….

She has some new words: shoes, ball, you’re welcome, I love you, huh?, oopsies, and night-night.

She has a new fascination with shoes. She always wants to change hers and also put on mine. She cannot understand why I don’t think it’s a good idea for her to walk around the house in my flip-flops. She’s also been good at losing my shoes… or at least one of them. Several times I’ve had to search the house for the match. Friday, I finally found it… slid under the oven!

She understands more and more what I am saying to her in English. She is even starting to obey a bit more. The other night we were eating at a hotel. We were sitting outside by their pool. She decided to run around a bit (have Lawrence chase her), but the problem was she was squealing (very loudly!) the whole time and disturbing other people. I told her, “Mercy, no screaming.” So she tried so hard to hold it in. It was cute to watch. Lawrence could not believe that she understood what I’d said. (More on Lawrence in another post).

She tells me most every time she has a dirty diaper. It may be time to start potty training when we get home. I’m not about to tackle that while I’m here.

She is totally obsessed with the song “Baby Jesus”. It goes like this (to the tune of ‘Frere Jacques’ or ‘Are You Sleeping?’): “ Baby Jesus, Baby Jesus, I love you. I love you. You are my Savior. You are my Savior. Every day. Every day.” She learned this from the homeboyz and one of the house maids. It’s a very common song for young children here. Mercy sings it all day long, or at least the “Baby Jesus, I love you” part. She’s pretty good at it, at least enough that when she’s singing it when we are out and about people know what she is singing. She may have a future in music.

She likes her new hair-do--at least that’s what Harriett and Lawrence tell me. They say she is happier now with it and also acts more grown up. Hmmm…. not sure on that one. ;)

My girl is getting tall. She’s grown 4 inches since late August. Some of her clothes still fit in the torso, it’s the length that is a problem. She’s getting some long legs! So unlike me, Emma, and Avery. We’ll be jealous!

She’s turning into a good American toddler. Her new favorite snack is fruit snacks. She’s going to be upset when my stash runs out. She also likes lemonheads and twizzlers, but I was only willing to share a few of those.

And she’s cutting another tooth! It’s one of her two year molars. She’s got more teeth than any kid her age that I’ve ever seen.

************************

And you may wonder, how are things holding up at home… Here’s a couple of Cody’s recent Facebook statuses about life at the Busby house:

Avery: "Dad my ankle hurts bad for no reason. It must be a growth sprout."

Me: "Must be. Those growth sprouts can be tough."

Avery (now hopping on one leg): "I know. I hate growth sprouts. I wish I had a wheel chair."

-------

These words came out of my mouth last night: "Emma, put down the book on Egyptian Hieroglyphics and go to sleep." Love my nerd.

-------

Emma: "I know Avery, let's play 'Indians.'"

Avery: "Yes! I want to be the girl who helped those men. Hocapontas."

Emma: "Daaaaad...guess what Avery just said!"

-------

Avery (hysterical & holding her arm up): "AAAAAHHHHH GET IT OFF HURRY!!! GET IT OFF!!!!!"

Me: "What!? What is it?!"

Avery: "My glow stick cracked on my arm and Emma said the juice is POISON!!!! AAAAAHHHH!!!!!"

Emma: "What I meant was..."



Oh, how I miss them. At least we know life with these three precious girls will always be interesting and entertaining.

I'm a Big Kid Now!

 Ok, Mercy took a giant leap from a baby to looking like a big kid today.  We got her hair done!  Harriett and a few other Ugandans have urged me to “do something with her hair!”  So I decided to bite the bullet and do it.  Harriett called a woman who specializes in hair for young children.  She came to the house so Mercy would feel more comfortable.  I had to run to my lawyer’s office for just a bit, so I left them to get started.  I’m kind of sick of making decisions these days, so I told Harriett to do whatever she wanted.  They decided on yarn braids/twists (called “threads” here).  The whole process took about 3.5 hours.  Mercy did great.  They entertained her with candy until I got home about 40 minutes into it.  Then I took over the entertaining, sometimes more successfully than others.  Finally, I put a DVD on my laptop and that did the trick.  Then Mercy got really fussy because it was past nap time.  So I got her to go to sleep and she slept about the last hour or so. The lady did a really good job of being gentle and not making them too tight.  I had to sit really still as she burned the ends of them with a birthday candle.  It was fascinating to this white mama to see how she did it and how quickly and adeptly her fingers moved.  I tried to pay really close attention, so I can give it a shot on my own one of these days.  Of course for me it will probably take about 7 hours.   If only I could pay Ugandan prices for hair styling at home ($12 and that includes supplies and transportation)!  I’m amazed at how little Mercy has messed with them.  She did stare at her reflection in the glass door for a while. Ha!  And she’s slept on them just fine… so far.  I can’t get over how much older it makes her look.  These should last for about a month.  Then we’ll see what other new style we can come up with.  This is a whole new world for me, but it’s kind of fun.

Towards the beginning...

 



All done!  I'm a big girl!



Amazing!



So long Howards!



Me, Mercy and the Howards

This afternoon the Howard Family heads back to the US. They have been such a special part of time here and I am sad to see them go. But isn’t God amazing that he’d give my oldest friend the same heart for Uganda as mine? Isn’t is unbelievable that we’d be here at the same time… that her family would be able to care for Mercy until I arrived… that I’d be able to stay in their home for 10 weeks… that Mercy would become a member of their extended family? I love how God orchestrated all of it. While I am going through one of the toughest situations in my life, God provided a friend for me with whom I can be brutally honest, show all emotions, and ask to do anything for me. He knew that I needed that.

The Howards came here with the intention of staying at least two years, but God had other plans. Their time is coming to a close after 6 months. Due to many circumstances they decided that for now the best thing is to move their family back to the US. But while they’ve been here, all of their hearts have been touched and God has used them in many ways. It’s been great to see how God has opened the eyes of their children to the needs of others. They’ve learned to be sacrificial givers, to love strangers, and how to minister to people on a day-to-day basis. They’ve learned to live with less and how to have joy in difficult circumstances. These are lessons I think we would all want our kids to learn. I know that even if the Howard family never lives overseas again as a family, that each person’s life has forever been changed. I love each of the kids so much and I will always be their “Aunt Lissa”.

One of the main things they accomplished while here was helping a group of children in a nearby neighborhood. They lovingly refer to them as the “homeboyz”. They met a few of these boys while they were hawking items on the street. The group multiplied as they brought their friends and siblings. These children came to the Howard’s home at least three days a week for a big meal of beans and rice. Many times there were more than 20 people at dinner. They also got to take showers, play games, and learn how to be a part of a family. Most of the kids are from single parent homes. Their mothers are so consumed with survival they do not get much attention from them. They soaked up every hug, touch, or conversation we could give them. It’s been a lot of fun to see each of them come out of their shell and start to open up. They each have a special place in my heart.



Homeboyz Christmas Party

Just before Christmas, the Howards threw a Christmas party for all of the children. This happened just before I left to come home and I was so glad I got to attend.  Each child brought their families with them.   Beth bought gifts for everyone.  Each family got a large basket with beans, rice, soap, sugar, and other supplies.   The kids got new backpacks, school supplies, candy and a small toy.  They were so excited and grateful for their gifts.



Showing off their new backpacks



Looking through their gifts

Many of the children were not enrolled in school. Even public school here costs money and can be quite a burden for a poor family. You have to pay enrollment fees, lunch fees, supplies, uniforms, and then tuition. This adds up quickly when you have multiple children and are living on less than approximately $60 per month. Beth and Jeremy made it their goal to get all of the kids in school. This was not an easy task. A few of the children have never been to school or at least not in years. They are several grades behind and had a lot of catching up to do. But they got all of the kids enrolled for the last term of the year. Beth and Jeremy have been searching for sponsors for the kids. The new school year starts here at the end of the month. They hope to have a sponsor for each child by then. The cost is approximately $36 per month.  The Howards have a couple of very trustworthy Ugandans that will oversee the sponsorship in their absence. If you and your family might be interested in sponsoring a child you can get more information on their website, http://www.lovegodandloveothers.com/. There you can also read more about the adventures the Howard family had while in Uganda.

I am sad to see my friends go. It’s strange to think I can’t just run over to their place now for some beans and rice or a game of UNO. But I am so grateful for them and the way they’ve been able to help and encourage me and my family during this time. I am excited to see what God is going to do with them next. Pray for them during the next 36 hours as all eight of them travel home. They will be flying most of that time. I think Jeremy said it was 5 takeoffs and landings in total… that cannot be easy with 6 children in tow. And pray for them as they settle back into life in Las Vegas. They are basically starting over. Pretty much everything they own is in their 16 bags they took with them. God has already provided housing, a vehicle, and a job, but there are many more details to be worked out.

Love you Howards! Safe travels and I look forward to seeing you again soon… in the US!



Changing Focus

Tomorrow starts a new work week and hopefully some progress in this adoption. I’ve met with many people in the last few days. Just yesterday I was given about 4 different choices on what to do. It was all a bit overwhelming. I came home and told Beth that it was just too much. I don’t know exactly what to do. None of it is easy or a given. Nothing is likely to happen too quickly and I just want someone to come in and make the decisions for me. Then I sat down to read from my new devotional book, “Jesus Calling” by Sarah Young. This is part of the passage from yesterday.

(As if Christ is speaking ) “You are surrounded by a sea of problems, but you are face to face with Me, your Peace. As long as you focus on me, you are safe. If you gaze too long at the myriad of problems around you, you will sink under the weight of your burdens. When you start to sink, simply call out “Help me Jesus!” and I will lift you up.

Why didn’t I read that before my days of meetings started? Yesterday, I felt like I was sinking. But thankfully, I am now trying to look Christ face to face and not down at the mess around me. I know God has a plan. I am praying for wisdom to see that plan and to make the best choices possible. Pray for all involved in this case- for God to soften hearts, grant wisdom, and for the concern to be for Mercy’s best interests.

Why I love my husband...



Young and in Love in 1996

12 years ago today I married a most amazing man. Little did I know all that would happen in the next 12 years, but I can say through every experience, good and bad, we have grown closer. On my wedding day I could not imagine loving him any more than I did at that moment, but I love him more each and every day.

The last 5 months, and really the last 18 months or so, of pursuing this adoption have solidified that love in a whole new way. He gave my husband a heart for adoption and more specifically a heart for Mercy. This is rare among adoptive dads. Most are dragged through the process or at least to the moment of decision, but not Cody. As many of you know, I met Mercy in Uganda in June of 2010. When I held her I knew she was to be our daughter, but I wasn’t sure how Cody would react. Would he think I was nuts? Would he rather have a son? I emailed him that night and told him. Without hesitation his response was “Let’s do it.” Wow. I love that he is willing to sacrifice a lot of things to complete this adoption. I love that he’s never questioned my need to be here in Uganda and never said we should give up. Instead he balances work and home, leaving early to pick up the girls at school and working at home late into the night. He’s going through backpacks, doing ponytails, coaching basketball and shopping for winter clothes. He’s remembering which day is library and which is PE and what to bring for show and tell. He’s contacting congressman, talking with lawyers, and mailing adoption t-shirts. All of this while also counseling people, performing weddings and funerals, preparing sermons, going over budgets and calendars and seeking out the best way to lead people to a more real and vibrant relationship with the Lord. This is not an easy task, but he does it willingly and constantly challenges himself to improve at all of it. This is just a small part of why I love this man and I am so grateful that God put him in my life. 


Still making me laugh in 2009 (sorry I don't have a more recent photo easily accessible right now.)



Back to Work

Well, I made it to Uganda safely. I arrived very late on Tuesday night. I went to the Howard’s to spend the night, since that is where Mercy was staying and she was already asleep. About 30 minutes after I arrived, she threw up. No rest for the weary, I had to go straight to action. She threw up one other time in the night, which meant I got very little (no) sleep at all. During the night she was never really awake enough to realize it was me caring for her. But in the morning when she woke up, she just stared at me. I smiled at her and started talking to her and singing her favorite song. In just a couple of minutes she started laughing and smiling and we’ve been good ever since. She did freak out when my friends, Simon and Kelly, showed up at the Howard’s to help me move all of our stuff back to the Cooks’ place. They were the ones that took me to the airport a few weeks ago, so I think she thought they were there to take me away again. After she was convinced she was staying with me, she was all good. And thankfully, she’s feeling much better today and I got some sleep last night.

I’ve already been busy making contacts on our case. I’ve visited lawyers and the embassy. All to no avail, but hopefully, some things will start happening in the next week or so. It looks like the earliest hope of a court date is early February. Pray for things to go smoothly, for God to give us wisdom in all of the decisions that have to be made, and for peace and understanding for all of my family during this separation.

And a couple of pics...

Doesn't my girl look pretty in orange?

And this is Mercy taking a picture of herself while I am on the phone. She's talented. By the way, see how long her hair is getting? Yesterday we had her first attempt at some braids, but she got sick of sitting still when it was only half done. I had to take it out today b/c I couldn't have her walking around with her hair half braided and there was no time to get it finished. But we're planning on getting it all done in the next few days. Pictures to follow! I'm sure it will be an experience.

Buy some Beads!!

***Updated Saturday night with new numbers of leftover beads**

Thursday's Bead Party was a huge success. I had no idea how many people would come. I told Cody it could be 5 people or 50 people. We had lots of ladies in and out the whole evening. A whole bunch of people showed up right at 6 o'clock and I thought a few of them were going to duke it out over a couple of pieces. So funny! Subtracting my overhead costs, we made more than $1000. Amazing! I can't wait to see people all over town wearing their gorgeous beads supporting Mercy and supporting the hard-working women of Uganda.

Here's a picture of me and the bead-makers at the market.

Lucky for all of you we have some leftovers! All of these pieces are made out of magazine/paper beads. Strips of paper are wrapped over and over to make these amazing designs and then varnish is put over the top to seal them.

I have 11 of the long necklaces. These are great worn doubled over and are some of my favorites because they go with so many things. They are approx. 24-28 inches long. They are all multi-colored, but some of them have some "base" colors. I have 2 black-based, 0 pink-based, 2 brown-based, and 1 blue-based, and 6 all multi-colored ($15 each).

Then I have single strand necklaces in mostly solid colors. They are approx. 17 inches long. I have a peach, dark green, yellow with yellow accents, and yellow with black accents, sky blue, and red. ($10 each)

Then I have two necklaces approx 13 inches long. One is smaller beads that are brick red, and the other is seafoam green with black. ($10 each)
Then I have one necklace 16 inches long with black pony beads and multi-colored paper beads ($12 each).


Then I have one necklace with larger beads that is approx 18 inches long. It is bright green ($15).




Then for bracelets, I have one green wrap around style ($7) and vertical bead stretch bracelets in black ($5). And then a single strand stretch bracelets in yellow($5 each).

Just send me an email (melissabusby@ hotmail.com) or Facebook message if you are interested in any of these pieces. It will be first come, first serve. All out-of-towners will need to add a couple of dollars to your total for shipping. And it looks like I will be buying more jewelry to bring home with me, so if you can't buy now, there will be a chance later too. Thanks!!

Reminder and Prayer Requests

I wanted to remind you about my Bead Party tomorrow night (Thursday). I am really excited to show you all some of the beautiful jewelry made by the women in Uganda. Just to clarify, this is all jewelry that I already purchased in Uganda and I am now selling to you. You don’t have to place an order or anything like that, it’s just first come, first serve on what I have on hand. The party is come and go from 6-9pm at my house. Anyone is welcome, so bring a friend. And for you out-of-towners, I’ll post all of the leftovers sometime this weekend, or if there is much demand, I can always buy more on this next trip.

In other news, Cody and I got to Skype with Mercy this morning. She was in a great mood, so I even got to talk to her. I was getting out of the shower when they called. Cody said Doug and Kat had the laptop on the bed and Mercy just plopped down on her tummy in front of it, looked at him and said, “Hi!” and started blowing him kisses. When I came in and started talking to her, she was all smiles and clapped for me. It warms my heart to see her happy and doing so well. I hate the idea of leaving home again, but I am excited to kiss and hug on Mercy next week.

We continue to be blown away by everyone’s love and concern. Just one evidence of this is Mercy’s closet. Months ago I mentioned that Mercy did not have any Fall/Winter clothes. Immediately, several friends went and bought things in anticipation of us coming home soon. Others gave us amazing hand-me-downs. I’ve spent hours this past week going through the clothes, figuring out what may fit, sorting sizes, and hanging them in the closet. Then this past week, I got even more clothes, many for Spring/Summer. She should be set for at least 9 months on clothes. Some of them are so cute, I cannot wait to put them on her. She’s going to be styling! I have had to buy very few things for Mercy at all. We’ve had a crib, changing table, sheets, clothes, diapers, strollers, car seats, diaper bags, and toys all given to us. Thank you friends. You are such a blessing!

We still don’t really have any updates on our case or an approximate timeline to share. We just ask you to keep praying for things to go smoothly and quickly when I return. There are a couple of options for the way things could progress, we’re just waiting to see which route to take and which doors God opens for us. I also ask you to pray for Emma and Avery. I know it’s going to be hard for them next week with me leaving again. Just when we start to get back in a regular routine I will leave. They have been so amazing through this whole process, but I just ask you to pray for strength and patience for them.