End of the Story

Someday, maybe, I’ll fill you in all of the crazy circumstances involving this adoption and even the last few days. It’s really pretty unbelievable. This roller coaster of emotions is ridiculous. To some degree, I am scared to think or feel anything.


But here’s the deal… we want everything done the right way. We want to be legal and ethical in all we do. We do not want people to question our integrity or this adoption. Although bureaucracy can be frustrating (ok, beyond frustrating) at times, we have laws for a reason. And while it would seem exceptions should be made in certain circumstances, I understand that it can be impossible to look at each situation on a case-by-case basis. If getting that special visa goes against the law, I do not want it. But, man, it sure was disappointing. If my current ruling is questionable in the eyes of some people, I want a new one that is not. This will involve more waiting, but I know it will be worth it in the end. I know many of you want to fight for us, and so do I, but there really is no one to fight right now. For whatever reason, we are stuck in what I’ve been describing as the “Perfect Storm”. Yes, there is injustice. Yes, we are reaping the consequences of other people’s actions, but that is life. I hate being made the example, but I hope it can benefit other families in the future.

Cody had a great point yesterday… he said that while this situation is horrible and frustrating, we know the end of the story. We know Mercy is our daughter and we know she will someday come home with us. Right now we don’t when, but we need to trust God and His timing. He set us on this path for a reason. God gave us a calling, but He never said it would be easy.

Please continue praying for us. I had two friends remind me of the story of Moses holding his arms up during the battle, and when he got tired the others held his arms up for him (Exodus 17). They said all of you are holding our arms up right now for us. It is so true. I am weary. Cody is tired. My children are exhausted. We are all frustrated. We need you to lift us up. I know you are because your prayers are what got me through the day, even with a few smiles and laughs. Each time I think I do not have the strength for more, God provides. I thought there was no way I could walk back into that embassy today and hand over Mercy’s passport to get a “revoked” stamp put in it, but I did. I did not think I had it in me to walk back into my lawyer’s office again, but I did. I worried so much about Cody having to tell Emma and Avery that Mommy and Mercy would not be home today, but he did it and they handled it. They are sad, but oh, how strong my girls are. They amaze me. Poor precious Mercy has no clue of the battle waging around her. In the midst of the horror of yesterday she was happily singing a song and making me somehow smile through my tears. Today she’s been in a great mood, oblivious to what’s happening. I’m glad. My sweet girl has endured enough in her short life. And I’m glad that I know the end of the story. It makes it a bit easier to hold my arms during this battle.